Late Night at the Video Store
“I’ll Be Right Back”
$15
You will not, but we admire the confidence.
The One Who Suggests Splitting Up
$20
A terrible survival strategy. A perfectly respectable ticket choice.
The Hot Best Friend
$35
Funniest person in the movie. Contractually forbidden from reaching the credits.
The Final Girl
$50
Covered in blood, clutching a household object, and suddenly incredible at cardio.
The Masked Killer
$75
Never runs. Somehow beat everyone to the venue. Obviously can afford Uber Black.
The Suspicious Sheriff
$100
Ignored fourteen warnings and arrived just in time to misunderstand everything. Do you even deserve that salary?
The Ancient Evil
$150
Accidentally awakened by queer performance and disposable income.
The Rich Idiot Who Bought the Haunted House
$200
The walls bleed, the basement whispers, and you waived the inspection. Enjoy your investment.
NOTAFLOF
Being broke is scary enough. If the ticket price is the thing chasing you, this one gets you through the door. No proof, no explanation, no shame—claim it and come survive the night with us.
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